131 - New Twitter
If you’re not on twitter you may not know but they have released a new version of their site and it’s being gradually rolled out to users across the site. What is wrong with it you ask? Most likely nothing it’s just that I don’t have it yet!
130 - Estimated time remaining
Most of the time I wonder what’s the point, it often seems that some programs use some sort of random number generator to tell you how long they’re going to take to do something.
129 - Pathetic hand dryers
I’m much more a fan of having a few paper towels in public toilets, much easier to dry your hands. That said there are some great hand dryers that feel like they could blow you skin off if you left your hands there too long, or that Dyson blade thing where you draaaaaaw your hands out. It’s bloody annoying though when you have a useless dryer and you can’t get your hands dry,...
128 - Surprisingly powerful tap
Powerful taps in themselves are not a problem, it’s when you don’t realise and just flip the tap on promptly soaking yourself. Irritating when at home, embarrassing when you emerge from a public toilet looking like you didn’t make it in there in time.
127 -Putting news in the middle of a film
If you’re a TV channel and you’re going to bother putting a film on please don’t put news in the middle of it. I can just about live with the ad breaks but a news broadcast! I don’t care if it’s entertainment news either, just because I’m watching a film doesn’t mean I’m interested in what is going on in Hollywood. This even happens during short...
126 - That spot that isn't a spot yet
The impending red blemish that heralds the arrival of a spot, it's not quite there yet but it's still noticeable, you don't have the satisfaction of squeezing anything because that just makes the mark bigger and more obvious. It's also still painful to prod at.
Just hurry up and turn into a spot so you can be squeezed damn you!
125 - Graffiti
Now don’t get me wrong a bit of Banksy doesn’t bother me, or those massive murals which are very part and parcel of some areas of the world. No I’m talking the kind of juvenile nonsense such as writing “MUFC rule” on the wall of a public toilet - what is the point? Do these people think everyone else comes in reads this on the wall and says to themselves “well...
124 - Soggy cereal
I’m not talking about the bits of weetabix that are left as you finish up, shortly before slurping the milk. More the type of soggy cereal where you pour the milk on and the door bell goes and by the time you’ve spoken to the postman and returned to your breakfast your cornflakes are mush soaking in a milky bowl.
123 - Self titled albums
So you’ve spent all that creativity coming up with a band name, then writing some songs and you haven’t got enough left for an album name? Really? Then don’t go and name it after yourself, at least choose a song as a title track.
122 - Getting cling film stuck around itself
It always happens when you aren’t really paying attention, you kind of pull at the roll only to look down to realise you’ve only pulled half of it. The rest is all kind of ripped and stuck around itself and bunching up at one end making it really difficult to find the edge and pull it all round an have it rolling smoothly again. Just think of all that wasted cling film, you can either...
121 - Two button toilet flush
Ok for the purposes of not sounding crude we shall refer to the toilet business as numbers 1 and 2. So my problem with the flush? I’m never sure which one to press. Is it supposed to be smaller button for the number 1? Or is it a ergonomic type thing where the big one is easier to press so that’s for number 1’s? When they have one and two dots do they relate to 1 and 2?
120 - Counting on your fingers when using online...
Thankfully logging on to your online banking isn’t something that you often do in public, but even sat at home you feel daft tapping your fingers to work out the 3rd, 7th and 8th letters of your password. Surely you should be able to do it without the finger work, what is this primary school?
119 - M. Night Shyamalan
It all started so well - the popular Sixth Sense and then the not too bad Unbreakable. Then er, Signs and closely followed by The Village - right I think we can see it’s all going a bit awry here and we haven’t even got to the Happening.
118 - When the person you over took catches up...
So having got through all the other irritations of country lanes and overtaking you finally manage to overtake that couple out for their Sunday drive. Then a bit further up the road you get stuck behind a queue behind a lorry and you look in your rear view mirror to see the people you overtook pulling up slowly behind you in the queue. You can feel their smug “that didn’t get you...